april 14th, 2024

as you can probably tell by now, my blog entries have grown sparse. but, i felt compelled to give a small life update today!

so, basically, i have a new hyper fixation, and it's hazbin hotel.

i know people have mixed opinions about the series, and those opinions i often agree with. i don't think it's a masterpiece of a cartoon, however, i've found myself having an absurd amount of fun with the fandom. it's been really good for me to have something like this to participate in - and it makes me really happy!

for the last two months or so i've pretty much spent every night hanging out with my friends in vrchat... in hazbin hotel avatars. it's been such a blast - i can confidently say these are some of the closest friends i've ever had. here are some pictures of us hanging out:



and this is a copy paste from an update i made on my discord server, but i'm going to put it here too because it basically puts all my thoughts from the last couple of months into a nice summary:

wanted to address something really quickly that i feel is important to say! i sort of wanted to update you all on What's Going On With Me.

as many of you know, for a little over three years i've been a streamer, with next to no breaks. in 2022 and 2023, i really put a lot of effort forth into my stream content: from scheduling a lot of streams to posting content to twitter/tumblr/tiktok/instagram - playing the whole social media game for lack of a better term. always trying to optimize my output. promo promo promo. you know the deal.

for the last two months or so, i did something that i haven't done since i had a day job: hang out with friends consistently every day. for nearly all of 2023, hanging out with friends and having a social life was on the backburner. if i was going to hang out with someone - it was for stream. everything was work, even hanging out with friends. truly, if you saw me interact with someone on stream in 2023, that was some of the only social interaction i had besides my wife and roommate irl.

these last two months, i traded the time i spent on editing extra content for social media and "growing my brand" for having friends. instead of working from the time i woke up to the time i slept, i started making time for my personal life again. i made my personal life a priority. and now that it's really set in, i think i've realized that full time content creation is not for me.

DON'T PANIC!

this is NOT a graduation announcement. i'm still streaming! i'm still arting! i'm still whoring (thanks fansly chumps). i just wanted to emphasize this change in mood. it means streams are more casual. i'm sure you've noticed i release a weekly schedule, but if i feel compelled to cancel a stream i do. i think this is the way i need to keep doing things to keep myself healthy. my streams haven't been as Popping numbers wise, and i'm trying not to care, because i know there's a trade off if i want Big Number. and it's not having a life outside of work.

streaming is still a huge source of income for me. art is my main source of income (commissions open). and the camwhoring is. well. you know what it is.

what it comes down to is the following: i love this community. i love the sprinkle squad with all my heart. but i can't do full time content creation. it has eaten me alive.

i'm happy to have 3 small jobs (stream, art, boob pics) instead of 1 big job (just streaming).

thank you for reading this essay! i could have kept it all inside, but i really do want you guys to see my entire content creation journey - the good AND bad. and this isn't good or bad really. it just is.

anyway, that's basically it, i think! i'll try to update the site every now and again whenever i'm in the mood!